In my nearly 20 years as a Divorce and Family Lawyer, I have seen many many clients handle the NJ Divorce process like superstars. Representing so many clients has given me the opportunity to notice certain positive actions of these clients that help them sail through to their final divorce decree. Below are the top four divorce survival tips:
1. Take care of yourself emotionally, outside of the divorce process. A good therapist, counselor, spiritual leader, and close group of friends can be instrumental in providing the support you need so you can begin to heal. Within the confines of these relationships you can explore the hurt and anger you are experiencing. This leads directly into my next point:
2. Deal with your divorce as a professional transaction. If you are taking care of your emotional health outside of the legal process, you will be able to deal with negotiations and legal obstacles with a business like attitude. This will avoid your emotions guiding your decisions. While this is the best way to approach the mechanics of your divorce it isn’t easy since it is a very personal experience. The right NJ Divorce attorney will be able to help keep you on track through the process and help you make those sound decisions that are in your short term and long term best interest.
3. Getting organized will empower you to feel that you are in control of your life. Putting time in to get all your “ducks in a row” at the beginning of the process will provide your legal team with a complete picture of your life so they can strategize the best way to handle your particular case. This organization will also cut down on the time it takes to finalize your divorce and therefore your legal fees as your attorney will not have to remind you for documents or ask you for pieces of information that may be missing. Clients often ask me what they need to gather so I’ve put a complete list on my website for you to reference. Have a hunch that an investment account exists but suddenly you cannot find a trace of it? A competent attorney will be able to help uncover every necessary document so don’t worry if some things are missing.
4. Become an expert in your money, this takes getting organized a bit further. This just doesn’t mean collecting financial information. Here I’m talking about taking an active role in the management of your finances. If your spouse has been handling the finances, now is the time to get involved, and quickly before you are locked out of accounts or dollars start to disappear.The minute you decide or are told about your divorce, start collecting financial information. Don’t worry if you cannot wrap your arms around everything, there are ways to uncover the important information no matter how hard your spouse may try to hide it.
In my office, my legal team and I realize that divorce is a very hard time in a person’s life. We strive to make it as easy as possible and consider ourselves partners with our clients. We are also aware that making the commitment to the four points above is easy, but maintaining them through the process can be difficult. We are here to help you at every step of the way so your interests are represented and your future protected.