New Jersey Divorce Lawyer Blog

Domestic Violence - Stalking: Part 1

Stalking is against the law in New Jersey. N.J.S.A. 2C:12-10 is the criminal statute for stalking. Here are some interesting statistics from the Stalking Resource Center:
• Over 1 million women and almost 371,000 men are stalked every year in the U.S.
• 1 out of 12 women will be stalked at some point in their lifetime.
• 77% of female victims know their stalker.
• 87% of people who commit stalking offenses are men.
These statistics paint a very serious picture. Stalking is a huge problem and can very easily escalate into a physical situation. Contact your local law enforcement immediately if you have suspect someone is stalking you. With the help of a qualified attorney, you can obtain a restraining order and help put an end to the fear.

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Posted In: After the Divorce , Alimony , Child Support , Divorce Lawyer , Domestic Violence , Domestic Violence Lawyer , Family Law Lawyer , Grounds for Divorce , Lawyers Fees , Online Resources , Statistics

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Domestic Violence – Violence Against Children: Part 2

The statistics listed in the prior post are telling. Children are victims of violence on a daily basis at an alarming rate. I have talked to women who say that their kids are too young to understand what’s going on in the home or they think that because the child isn’t old enough to express verbally what is occurring, that they may not be effected. In addition, some people may think that because the child isn’t being physically or emotionally abused that they are safe.

In my experience, children are very perceptive. Even if they can’t walk or talk, they understand emotion. Children recognize when mommy or daddy is angry, upset, nervous or sad. Children can sense tension in the home. Domestic violence can have very serious consequences for you and your children. But there are so many resources to help you and your family through this troubling time. The law can protect you and your children from further abuse.

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Posted In: Alimony , Child Support , Divorce Lawyer , Domestic Violence , Domestic Violence Lawyer , Family Law Lawyer

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The majority of the law I practice involves helping women through difficult divorces where domestic violence is present. One of the most difficult situations to address is violence against the children present in the home, or while the children are present.

www.endabuse.org is a great website that states some of the staggering statistics on domestic violence and children. Here are a few of them:

• A study of over 6,000 American families showed that 50% of men who frequently abuse their wives also abuse their children.
• Over 50% of women who are victims of domestic violence live have children under the age of 12 living in the home where the violence occurs.
• Somewhere between 3 and 10 million children per year witness some form of domestic violence.

The bottom line is that children who live in homes with an abuser, whether they are being physically harmed or not, will suffer the consequences.

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Posted In: After the Divorce , Alimony , Child Support , Divorce Lawyer , Domestic Violence , Domestic Violence Lawyer , Family Law Lawyer , Grounds for Divorce , Lawyers Fees , Online Resources , Statistics

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Domestic Violence – What are the facts?

The sad truth is that 1 out of every 4 women will experience domestic violence in
their lifetime. It is truly an amazing statistic that is staggering. Check out this website to get more statistics on the extent of domestic violence in New Jersey.

More facts on domestic violence

If you are being abused, either physically or emotionally, there are alternatives for you and your children. They are people who can help. The best thing to do is contact your local domestic violence hotline to get more information on how to solve the immediate problem.

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Domestic Violence – Can I change the locks on the marital residence?

This is a very common question I get from people who are trying to forcible remove their spouse from the marital residence. If you are going through a divorce and simply do not want to live with your spouse any longer, you cannot just change the locks. Both parties have a right to remain in the home.

However, if you have obtained a restraining order, and you have been granted permission to remain in the home, you CAN change the locks. In fact, to protect the safety of you and your children, you should get the locks changed as soon as possible.

In addition, if your spouse has voluntarily moved out of the home and is staying with a relative or his/her own space, you may be able to change the locks. You should know that it is always best to get advise from a lawyer based on your individual circumstances before you take any action.

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Domestic Violence – What can I do at home to increase my personal safety?

Getting the person who is abusing you out of your home is only the first step in a difficult and emotional process. When I go to court and help clients obtain final restraining orders, they are often faced with the problem of increased hostility and need direction in how to make their homes safe. There are some things that you can do to help make your home safe for you and your children. The Violence Prevention Fund has offered this list of safety tips:
1. The first thing you should always do is to change the locks on your doors and any windows. It is also important to keep the house locked even when you are at home.
2. If you can afford to do so, install a security system.
3. Make sure you always have your car doors locked, even if the car is in your driveway or garage.
4. Talk to your children and make sure they know how to call family members, friends or 911 if the abuser returns to the home.
5. It is also a good idea to establish a code word that friends and family know is a call for help. It is very important to keep as many supportive people around you as possible. Friends and family can be invaluable resources.
6. If you do have children, make sure you talk to their caregivers, either their school or day care to give them a list of who has permission to pick them up.

USEFUL RESOURCES

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